'House Arrest' in Killarney

    ‘House Arrest’ - Ordered by the court to be confined in your residence and only able to leave for medical or employment reasons.  

    Sure seemed like we were under 'House Arrest' because we were totally confined.  We were locked INSIDE our Airbnb apartment.  We could not get out and were not even able to leave for ‘tourist’ reasons.  

Killarney Airbnb - 3rd Floor with Open Courtyard

    Have you ever locked yourself out of your house or your car?  So frustrating, right?  And, you try to figure out a way to get in without breaking a window.  Or, you try to put your smallest child thru a window to unlock the door.  Good luck with that!     

We could not unlock the front door from the inside to get out! 

Who?  My girlfriend, Margery, and I.

When?  The morning after we arrived in Killarney at our Airbnb.

Why?  The house key would not unlock the front door from inside! 

Back Door?  Yes, but three flights off the ground with no stairs.

Windows to Climb Out?  Not really, because the front windows only opened about 8”.  Even I couldn't squeeze through that opening!

See the Small Windows on the Left?

    But, let’s start from the beginning.  And, remember this is the Emerald Isle. 

 

Emerald Isle - Dingle Peninsula

    

    Why so green?  I think we all know the answer to that.  It rains about 225 days a year in this southwest area of Ireland.  So, our travel day is rainy, gray, cloudy, cool and windy as are many of our days in Ireland.  

                    

Dingle Peninsula

    

        We booked a ticket on the Eireann Bus from Doolin which is a very small coastal village in County Clare in Southwest Ireland with a population of only around 500.  But including tourists, probably another 300 people.  

Doolin Village

Doolin

    First, the bus arriving into Doolin was about 30 minutes late.  We had a 2.5 hour bus ride ahead of us over narrow, hilly, winding roads.  

    Therefore, we did not arrive in Ennis on time and had missed our connecting bus to Limerick.  

    Surely, there will be other buses from Ennis to Limerick.

    We checked the bus schedules posted on the wall at the Bus Station.

    Much to our dismay, we found that there were simply no other buses from Ennis thru Limerick to our FINAL destination of Killarney for the remainder of the day!  This day just got longer!  

    We missed our only bus connection.  Now what?

How Do We Get From Here to There?

    Our bus driver came over to us confirming our dilemma.  Sorry, he said, but there are no more buses out of Ennis going to Limerick.  Also, there was no ticket agent at this tiny bus/train station.  Only a Ticket Machine which was not useful because we had already purchased our tickets.  

    However, the bus driver was most helpful because he spoke with the Train Master about our situation.  Fortunately, most bus stations and train stations are located side-by-side in Ireland.  Smart planning, right? 

                                

Train Station

    Our bus driver was able to persuade the Train Master to allow us to take the next train out of Ennis into Limerick without buying a train ticket.  

    Whew…  Difficult situation avoided.  So, we boarded the train which was nearly full and arrived in Limerick only a few hours later. 

    We quickly found our bus to Killarney.  Again, because of the convenience of having the bus/train station combination.  Two more hours on this bus and we arrived around 3 pm in Killarney (Irish Cill Airne, County Kerry).  

    

    Rainy and windy in Killarney!  Time for the windbreaker and hood pulled over my head as we walked about 20 minutes from the train station out onto the slick, wet streets. 

    I had very detailed directions from our Airbnb host, so we easily arrived at our apartment.

    But, this is when the fun begins!  

    First, there are two Key Code Pads on the front of the building.  We were to use the lower keypad which needed a 4-digit code to open the main door.  Done!  We got into the building out of the rain and cold.  Great!

    Next, we took an elevator to the top floor - Level 2 (which is really the 3rd floor in Ireland).  Remember, in other countries there is the Ground Floor (which is our 1st floor in the USA). 

 

    Then the 1st Floor (which is really the 2nd floor).

    Finally, the 2nd Floor (which is actually the 3rd floor).  Confused yet?  

    Here is where it gets tricky.  Our Airbnb is on the 3rd floor which is on the top of the building and has a huge open courtyard with access to all of the apartments.  

    Guess what?  Now, we are outside again and remember that it is still windy, cold and raining on us!  Wet shoes and socks now.  

                        

    Found the apartment.  Next challenge…  

    Huge, black lock box about 9" x 9" with a keypad attached to the wall.  It’s nearly dark, 49 degrees, very windy and still raining like crazy as I navigate the lock box which is where the house key is located.  

    Earlier that day, Sean, our Airbnb host, had texted me the 12 digit key code that included a small icon.  Sounds easy enough, right?

    First step, I had to place my hand on or over the keypad to activate it.  Then, once the keypad lights up, I had to enter the 12 digit key code to open the lock box to retrieve the apartment key.

    Keypad lights up…  I entered the code…  I tried to pull the lockbox open from the top down to retrieve the house key.  Nope!  Didn’t work…

    I must have tried the 12 digit key code at least half a dozen times.  Margery also tried the code.  It’s getting darker and darker.  We are getting wetter and colder.  We are also getting frustrated with this key code situation!  

    I'm now fantasizing about an ice cold, freshly poured Guinness!  

    

    Finally, I looked closely at the instructions and at the keypad to understand the icon.  Guess what?

    The icon was a picture of the ‘lock’ which I should also have been pressing!  I thought it merely indicated that the lock box would actually pop open.  

    But, no…  I missed one symbol and that was the most important part of the code.  Finally, I was able to pull the handle, open the lock box and retrieve the very important key to the door.

    Thank goodness!  Here we go…  But, not so fast!  I put the key into the door lock, turned it appropriately, pushed the door to open it, but it would not budge.  I tried the key several more times.  Margery tried her luck with the key, the lock, and the door to no avail.

    We simply cannot unlock the door to our Airbnb.  Now, we are tired, wet, hungry, cold and super frustrated!  I called Sean, our Airbnb host, to let him know that we could not get into the apartment.  He was super understanding.  Said that he was 5 minutes away and would be there quickly.

    Sean arrived, put the key into the lock and opened the door easily!  What’s the trick?  So, he told us that when the key feels as though it won’t turn any more, pull the door handle up and push the door open. 

    What?  Did we not try that too?  Guess not.  So, we finally were in the apartment and out of the cold and pouring rain.  

                            

    We dried off, left our small carry-on luggage in our rooms and went out to find some fish and chips at one of the many cozy, warm pubs in Killarney.  

    Happy ending to this seemingly endless day!

                    

    Tomorrow we will enjoy all that Killarney has to offer.  

    We planned to tour the Muckross Abbey, Muckross House, Killarney National Park, shops, pubs and all things Irish, including the Jaunting Cars.  

Killarney - Jaunting Car

  

    Jaunting Cars are light two-wheeled carriages for a single horse with a seat in front for the driver.  

    Most commonly, the back has seats for two or four people and is covered from the weather.

Killarney - Jaunting Car

Muckross House, Killarney National Park

New morning, new day...

    Should be easy to unlock the front door and leave the apartment.  Sounds simple, right?  Well, not so easy or fast. 

    In most European countries, your house key is used to unlock the front door from the outside, but also to lock the front door from the inside.  We had a bit of difficulty with a few locks in France and Switzerland last year.  

    But, we are experienced travelers and know how these keys and locks work.  Or, so we thought.

    Now we are ready to leave the apartment.  I inserted the key into the inside lock to unlock the front door so we can head out for a wonderful day.

    But, the key will not turn in the lock.  I tried several times to unlock the door so we could get on with our day.  There must be a chocolate croissant somewhere close by in a bakery!  I really want that croissant, now! 

    We simply cannot unlock the door.  We cannot get OUT!  Can’t get in, can’t get out!  Really? 

    So, this is how we are going to spend our day in Killarney?  Under ‘House Arrest’ because we literally cannot get out of this place?  I am fit to be tied and not a happy camper at this point.   

    Once again, I called our buddy, Sean.  Bad news though, turns out that he is NOT in Killarney that day.  He cannot get us out of the apartment!  Excuse me?  

    But, he said he would call his locksmith to see if he could come and take care of the problem.  Sean called us back in 10 minutes to let us know that Peter, the locksmith, will be at the apartment in about 30 minutes.  

    Great…  Time for a cup of tea.  At least, we have a full kitchen with tea bags, etc. 

    Finally the locksmith arrived with his tool bag.  We handed him the keys through the front window (you know, the window that we can’t squeeze through even if there was a fire).  

    Well, Peter, the good looking locksmith with his charming Irish accent, quickly put the key in the door, click-click, and opened the front door!  We were free at last.  But, as he then tried to show us how to unlock and lock the door, he also had some trouble.

    Turns out that the lock needed some adjustments.  He had to remove the door lock, replace the cylinder and work on the door jam section to shave this and that, clean things, lubricate the lock, etc.  

    So, we had not been doing anything wrong, the lock and key were not exactly in sync with one another.  

    Another hour or so went by.  Finally he determined that the lock and key should work for us.  He also showed us the trick about how to turn the key, lift the handle, pull or push the door.  Why can’t this be easier?  Whew… 

    Wasted a couple of hours with this craziness, but hopefully we can get in and out tonight and tomorrow without much difficulty.  Fingers crossed!  No more ‘House Arrest’!  

    As I said, in Europe it seems that the locks and keys are tricky.  Last year we had an apartment in Thun, Switzerland that had the most intricate method of unlocking the door from the outside, then another entirely secret method to lock it from the inside.

    But, remember, you also must be able to unlock the door from the inside every morning.  And, finally, one needs to lock the door from the outside upon departing for the day.  It's complicated, to be sure.

    I had a full page of instructions from the Airbnb host on how to do these FOUR things to get us in and out of our Thun apartment.  And, every single time I used the key, I had to refer to this set of instructions.  

    In the US, I have one key to my house and it simply unlocks my door.  Then, from the inside I merely turn the button to lock it. 

    Why is it so complicated in other countries? 

    The story does have a happy ending though.  We thoroughly enjoyed Killarney including touring the Muckross House (built between 1839 - 1843), the ancient Muckross Abbey founded in 1448 as a Franciscan friary, and Lough Leane (Lake Leane) which are all in The Killarney National Park.  

Muckross Abbey - 1448

Muckross Abbey with Yew Tree

Muckross Abbey

    We also took a bus tour of the Dingle Peninsula and Slea Head Drive which was incredibly stunning with spectacular vistas around each curve on the one way road which our bus drove clockwise (the only direction you can travel).   

Gallarus Oratory, Dingle Peninsula

    But, one of my favorite things to do in every town was to go into as many pubs that I could as I walked around.  I totally loved to just have a look at the old beautifully carved wood interiors including the back bars, fireplaces, original bookcases, interesting tables with chairs that hardly every matched.    

Cats Love Pubs!  Too many pints for him!

Pub in Killarney

    

    And, there are so, so many pubs here.  As you know, pub is short for ‘public house’ and they are seriously just like an extended living room. 

    

    People pop in to enjoy a pint, read the newspaper and have a conversation with the barkeep and friends.  There are often several different connecting rooms in pubs with additional bars and cozy, comfy, private seating.  

Newspaper, Whiskey and Water

Kilkenny Pub - Beautiful Woodwork!

Pub in Kilkenny - Tin Ceilings & Leather Barstools

  

Singing & Playing - O'Connor's Pub

    There is occasionally a small bandstand for the musicians.  Typically though, the musicians just sit at a large table in the middle of one of the rooms.  

    Everyone else sits at nearby tables eating, drinking or standing to watch and listen to the trad music.  

    I saw as many as seven musicians around one large table at O’Connor’s Pub in Doolin on a raucous Saturday night!

Gus O'Connor's Pub - Doolin

Musicians at O'Connor's Pub, Doolin

    Despite some rain, wind and cool temps, we enjoyed several old pubs and listened to some wonderful musicians playing the best traditional Irish music. 

Kilkenny - Matt The Millers Pub

    The shops were filled with the most beautiful Irish sweaters, Aran Island patterned sweaters, wool and cashmere throws and shawls, Newsboy hats, tweed jackets, rain slickers, and colorful Wellies (boots which everyone wears).  

Newsboy Caps 

Colorful Wellies in Dingle

    Ireland also had some of the most delicious seafood chowder I've ever tasted.    

    In addition, I feasted on lightly battered, yet crisp, Fish ‘n’ Chips, excellent Steak & Guinness pie, and Cottage Pie.  

    But the very best menu item was the Guinness Bread and the traditional Soda Bread with creamy, salted butter.  Doesn't get any better than that!  I could eat that bread all day long!

Alex - The Barkeep at 'The Hole in the Wall' Pub

   Last, my travel experience was highlighted by truly friendly Irish people with their lilting, charming accents along with the best tasting Guinness in the pubs!!!  

'Hole in the Wall' Pub - Kilkenny

Pubs in Belfast - Commercial Alley

Kytelers Pub - Kilkenny

Belfast Pub

The Wedding Night - Abu Dhabi

Wedding Tent - Abu Dhabi

I stepped out of the yellow Al Ghazal taxi at the large, ultra white Wedding Tent on Airport Road in Abu Dhabi on an exceedingly hot and humid April evening at about 9:30 pm.  It felt so strange to be all dressed up on a Monday night to attend a wedding reception without my husband as my escort.  

But, because weddings are segregated affairs in the United Arab Emirates, he wouldn’t have been able to accompany me anyway.  Haifa, one of my ESL students, had invited me to her cousin Nourah’s wedding party. 

I’m dressed in a long evening gown along with about 400 Emirati women also elegantly dressed like they are going to the Met Gala in New York City! 

Thursday night is the preferred time to have your wedding in the Middle East because it is the eve of the Friday sermon at the mosque.  The Wedding Tent must have been booked for Thursday, because here we are attending on a Monday night. 

Entrance to Wedding Tent, Abu Dhabi

    I wore a fabulous, glittering, crimson red, body hugging, sleeveless floor length dress with a beautiful matching scarf.  

    Large gold earrings adorned my ears and heavy gold bracelets on my wrist.

 

I walked in a pair of ultra glamorous, bronze four-inch heels.  An ivory beaded bag with a gold chain completed my outfit.  

My short hair was brushed off my face and my makeup was perfect.  I was ready for the wedding extravaganza!

Wedding Tent, Abu Dhabi

As I exited the taxi, I could hear the party was in full swing.  The Wedding Tent was practically bursting at the seams with loud, pulsating music and clapping.  I heard laughter and joyful sounds coming from the women as I walked through the door.  

About 400 friends and family members, all female, of the bride and groom were already at the event and having a great time!  The all white Wedding Tent was a permanent structure which looked like several enormous circus tents complete with pointed tops, ropes and poles.  This is a typical wedding venue all over the Middle East.    

The men and women were separated, of course.  The men were on one side of the wedding tent and the women on the other.  

Several fragrances delighted my sense of smell.  The aromas of exotic oils, perfumes, incense and delicious food floated through the air. 

What an incredible sensory barrage!  Sights, sounds, and smells like nothing I have ever experienced.  The women looked amazing!  

Incredibly beautiful floor length gowns and more gold jewelry than the Gold Souk!  

All  makeup looked as though it had been done professionally and everyone had their hair lavishly done up or elegantly cascading down their shoulders and backs.  

What a spectacle it was!  I felt like I had walked into the Arabian Nights. 

Never had I seen such beaded, sequined, colorful floor length gowns with pearls, fringe, strapless, low backs, terrific cleavage producing dresses, incredible shoes, handbags to die for and hair accessories…  Fabrics ranged from silk to satin and everything in between. 

But, the jewelry – Saudi Gaudi...  

This is a term I created to describe the over-the-top jewelry the women bought and wore on special occasions.  Intricate dangling earrings, exquisitely large gold and precious gem necklaces, diamond bracelets and more rings than I’ve ever seen. 

                                                       

 
         

  

Normally, you would never see any of this jewelry displayed in public because women must wear their black, floor length abayas to cover their bodies head-to-toe and sheylas to cover their hair.  They are also partially or totally veiled while in public, therefore their beautifully made-up faces don’t show.  So, no jewelry is ever displayed, except for a wristwatch.  Also, wedding bands are generally not worn.

Back to the wedding party!  What fun these ladies were having!  They were all talking at once, laughing, and just having a great time visiting with each other.  

Haifa introduced me to her family and friends where I was warmly greeted and given kisses on both of my cheeks.  

We communicated even though many of them did not speak English.  I spoke a few phrases in Arabic expressing my joy at being at the wedding.  Lots of smiles and nodding all around as I complimented several women on their evening gowns and jewelry.  

But, words were not even necessary to show my admiration.  A genuine smile is the 'Universal Language'.    

Dinner was served around 10:30 pm.  What a feast!  We sat at large round tables with seating for 10 ladies.  At the beginning of the banquet, the female wait staff brought out a sampling of various olives, pickles, a platter of unsliced tomatoes, lemon and cucumbers, along with the hummus and flat bread.  I could have made a meal of that, but I did enjoy the meat and vegetable dishes. 

Interior of Wedding Tent

 The waiters then served a dinner of various dishes, large trays of meat and vegetables, in communal bowls.  Food was placed in the center of the table and everyone began eating.  

No utensils were used!  Yes, I said that there were no utensils.  I asked for a knife and fork from the servers which is quite acceptable for a Westerner.  My utensils were quickly handed to me.  

All of the Emirati ladies ate with her right hand using the flat Arabic bread as a scoop or utensil and no one made a mess of anything.  They have had lots of practice and not one morsel was dropped on their dresses.  We had hummus, tabouleh, mixed grills, vegetable dishes, lamb, chicken, beef, flat bread, potatoes, and more.  So incredibly delicious! 

The Wedding Singer

The Wedding Singer

During our meal, an extraordinarily sexy, voluptuous, exotic Lebanese woman sang and danced on the catwalk of the bridal dais.  Then she gyrated her way around all of the dinner tables throughout the room.  Her outfit was right out of a Las Vegas revue.  

She wore a tightly fitted black and gold sequined floor length dress which was cut very low across the bodice with more fringe and beads than I’ve ever seen.  Her long skirt was slit up both sides showing great legs and 5-inch spiked heels.  Don’t know how she danced and moved in those heels, but she did a great job! 

What a voice!  She sang with an Arabic sound track and she just made you want to get up and dance!  Actually, several women in the room did get up to dance.  They danced with each other or by themselves while singing along with the music they knew so well.  Sound familiar?     

The Lebanese singer could really strut her stuff, as well as sing!  She whipped her hips around and the fringe went flying.  She strutted in her heels.  She flipped her long mane of ebony hair from side to side. She moved like a belly dancer or a stripper.  I only wish I could move like that and had the body to go along with it! 

As the evening went on, I witnessed something very weird and wonderful, something I had never seen or heard before.  There were some extremely old matriarchs dressed in the traditional Middle Eastern black abayas who had an unusual throaty, guttural sound that they sang out.  These wise, weathered women closed their eyes, opened their mouths and animal-like sounds came out.  Sort of like a ‘warbling’ sound, but very tribal and earthy.  

These women were almost scary in their concentration as they swayed, danced and warbled.  One woman would whoop and then across the room another of the female matriarchs would answer with her distinct, expressive sound.  

It was incredibly rhythmic, utterly emotional and quite sensual.  The sounds came from deep within their souls.  I felt it penetrate my body, go through me, and straight to my soul too. 

I wondered what the chanting meant and why they did it.  A rite of passage, perhaps.  A welcome to the virgin bride’s wedding night, to womanhood and to the life of matrimony.  

I had made some of the same sounds during childbirth, but I wasn’t having nearly as much fun as these women. 

As we were eating, whispers raced through the crowd.  All of the sudden, there was a sound like a flock of birds flapping their wings and taking flight.  Whirring, swishing noises, the sound of material swirling, then the room went silent.  No more singing and no more talking.  

There was a sea of black everywhere I looked as the Emirati women quickly put on their abayas, sheylas and veils over their fancy evening dresses covering their bodies, hair and faces.  What was happening? 

Then more whispers throughout the wedding tent letting us know that the groom would soon be entering with his father and brothers to have photographs taken with the bride on the large dais in the middle of the room.  This was an unusual occurrence because ALL wedding celebrations are segregated and wedding photos are rare.  Men are never allowed in the women’s side of the reception.   

Eventually, the groom, his brothers and father walked in wearing the men’s national dress in the Gulf region which is the pure white, pristinely ironed, floor length Dishdasha or Khandoura with their Ghutras covering their heads.  The Ghutra is a white head cloth with a twisted black, rope like coil wrapped around it.  Under the headdress is a skull cap call a Gafia.  Handsome and elegant!

The men looked straight ahead.  No eye contact was made.  The room was stone silent.  Everyone stopped eating to watch the procession.  The groom entered the hall first, followed by his father and brothers.  They walked straight to the bridal dais which looked like a Paris fashion runway but in a T-shape and made of Plexiglas.  It was about three feet off the floor with steps up each side.  

The men walked up on the dais posing for photographs with the bride who was seated on a curved lounge or fainting sofa in the center of the dais. 

 There were flowers and greenery on the pergola above with lovely blossoms hanging down. 

Hundreds of flashes went off for about 10 minutes as everyone recorded the moment when the groom saw his bride in her exquisite wedding gown.  Photos were taken again and again.  

This is out of the norm also, because photos of people are rarely taken.  After the photo opportunity, the men left the tent and the singing and dancing started up again.

Dancing, singing, whooping…  The noise level was deafening.  Everyone at the party went up the dais stairs to congratulate, kiss and hug the bride who received hundreds of well wishes very graciously.  She was young and lovely.  

Her pure white bridal gown was strapless with a full hooped skirt of white tulle and satin bodice.  She wore a diamond necklace and tear drop shaped earrings given to her by her husband.  Her makeup was as perfect as her hair.  She looked like a princess at a ball.  Happiness sparkled in her eyes as she celebrated with her family and friends at the wedding party.  

Ayala or Stick Dance 

Dance with Sticks - Ayala

I only hope that her husband and his friends had half as much fun on the other side of the wall with all of the men!!!  

What do men do at a wedding reception with only other men?

They dance what is generally known as the Ayala or 'stick dance'.  This traditional, fascinating UAE folk dance is accompanied by drumming and performed by two rows of dancers facing one anther.  

Dancers are positioned close together in rows, signifying the unity and cooperation among tribal people.  The dance is usually performed at top events, national ceremonies and weddings in the UAE.  

Patchi Wedding Chocolates

But there was still more to partake in at the party.  Desserts, aromatic oils, incense and more dancing.  

After the food was cleared from the tables, women came around with enormous trays of dates and chocolates.  There must have been 25 different kinds of dates to choose from.  

Then, the chocolates were passed by the servers.  Again, dark chocolates, light chocolates, Godiva, Patchi, chocolates of every shape, size and color with exotic flavors. 

 Many were wrapped individually, so we were encouraged to take several pieces home with us in our handbags, which I did and shared with my husband. 

Tea and dates were served at each table in elegant glasses and on silver trays. 

Yet, the dancing and singing continued!  The Lebanese singer had quite the repertoire!    

 

Coffee was also served along with the dates and chocolates.  Huge urns were placed on the tables along with tea bags, sugar cubes and small cups. 

 Traditional Arabic coffee (Kahwa) is served black without sugar in small cups about the size of a soft boiled egg cup. 

The local coffee is mild with a distinctive taste of cardamom and saffron.  It is served with dates to sweeten the palate between sips.  It is considered polite to drink about three cups of the coffee.

After the fabulous desserts, women began to walk around with crystal bottles with long stoppers to put aromatic Oud oil on everyone.  A beautiful older woman with exquisite dark eyes outlined in kohl stopped at our table and began dabbing oil on all of us.  

She indicated that I should extend my arm so she could run the stopper up and down my arm.  She also dabbed some oil on my neck and scarf.  

The aroma of Oud was like nothing I’ve ever smelled. 

 Woodsy, patchouli-like, a deep fragrance which would last about two weeks on my skin.  

It was so amazing that it didn’t wear off for those two weeks.  I loved the aroma and would have bought some of the Oud.  

However, this particular essence of oil was about 3,000 dirhams per ounce.  That’s a lot of money, either in dollars ($816) or in dirhams!  

The wedding celebration still wasn’t over!  Incense wafted through the room.  I looked up and saw another Emirati woman carrying a medium sized incense burner leaving a trail of smoke.  She was stopping and wafting the incense smoke into the women’s long hair and under the floor length gowns.  Everyone laughed with me because I had such short hair and there was no way to waft the aroma in my hair.  

So, she lifted my floor length dress and had me stand over the incense burner!  The smoke certainly flowed upward and into my clothes and body!  

I smelled better at the end of the evening than I had at the beginning of the wedding.  Just lovely… 

It was about 1:30 am on Tuesday morning and I had experienced so much in the last four hours at the wedding reception.  New people, new customs, new aromas, food, fragrances…  It was the most fun I had had in a long time. 

Before the wedding, I asked Haifa about taking a wedding gift for the couple.  She answered that no gifts would be received at this reception.  Wedding gifts could be sent or taken to the groom’s home, which I did.

A wedding in the Middle East is a time for enormous celebration!  It takes place over about three days to one week in which time the marriage contract is signed.  As soon as the bride accepts the offer of marriage, the plans begin.  She prepares for her wedding for months in advance. 

Then, if the bride works full-time, she will take about two months off from her job to be fitted for her gown, have her hair oiled, have henna painted on her arms, hands, legs and feet.  

She will also visit with family who arrive weeks in advance and spend more time with her fiancé, chaperoned, of course. 

 The wedding day for a woman is the biggest event in her life, other than having children. 

Typically, around 2:00 am, the bride and groom leave separately for the groom’s home to continue the celebration with his family.  This is also where the marriage is consummated – under the roof of the bride’s mother-in-law and father-in-law’s villa.  

Why?  Because the newlyweds will live with his family for several months or years until they find a home of their own and can afford to live apart from his family. 

Most marriages are arranged by the parents of the bride and groom. 

 Now, you’re asking what if the girl doesn’t like the young man and doesn’t want to marry him after her parents have selected him.  

The young woman can decline the offer, but after two or three times of saying ‘no’, then she most likely will not be asked for her hand again in marriage.  

The girls marry quite young, often at 16, 17 or 18 years of age.  The young men are typically about 18 or older.  The more education the young people have, the later they marry.  

Most young people are married by the time they are 20 years old.  Time to have children!

It was an exquisite wedding celebration and a very happy occasion!  I felt so fortunate to have been a part of such a beautiful cultural experience.  

This was the first of many wedding parties that I attended with my dear Emirati friends.